[Leadershipgroup] Foster Parents Right to Adopt
Hello Everyone, I've run into a problem too many times recently and I'd like to know if there is anything we can do about it. It is very frustrating when I contact a foster parent about a PA who wants to meet their foster bird and they tell me that they want to adopt the bird. I know that foster parents have first option of adopting their fosters but can we put in some sort of stipulation that they must let us know BEFORE there is interest in their foster? And if they do not, the PA is allowed to come and meet the bird and adopt if they choose? I am dealing with two situations such as this right now and I just don't think that it is fair to the PA. Many set their sights on a specific bird. And the bird remains on the "Available" page on the website. I contact the foster parent to let them know to please contact the PA for a meeting...and at that point they say something like..."Oh, my husband has fallen in love with the bird and we just cannot give her up". I then have the job of letting the PA know that the bird is no longer available and they are wondering why the bird is still on the available page if that is the case. Many get *very* upset. One lady told me she didn't want to talk to me any longer and she handed the phone to her husband. I totally agree that foster parents should be allowed to adopt first if they choose. But I also think that they should not be able to wait until someone else wants to adopt their foster. If no one else is having this problem, can I put in a stipulation for cockatiels only? Thoughts? Maria ============================= Mickaboo Companion Bird Rescue "Don't buy, don't breed....... ADOPT! "Within yourselves let grow a boundless love for all creatures. Strive for this with a one-pointed mind; your life will bring heaven to earth." ~ The Buddha
On Wed, Mar 4, 2009 at 1:26 PM, Maria Pangelina
Hello Everyone,
I've run into a problem too many times recently and I'd like to know if there is anything we can do about it.
It is very frustrating when I contact a foster parent about a PA who wants to meet their foster bird and they tell me that they want to adopt the bird. I know that foster parents have first option of adopting their fosters but can we put in some sort of stipulation that they must let us know BEFORE there is interest in their foster? And if they do not, the PA is allowed to come and meet the bird and adopt if they choose?
I don't think it's done maliciously - sometimes it's not until you are told the bird may be taken away that you realize just how much you can't stand the thought of that happening. That happened twice with my family (once to my son, once to me). And honestly, if we are interested in what's best for the bird and the foster home is a good one, then what's best is the bird not being uprooted yet again if it can have a forever home where it has been living for the last while (however long that is).
I am dealing with two situations such as this right now and I just don't think that it is fair to the PA.
I do my best remember to advise my PAs up front that the foster homes have first right of refusal - and explain the thoughts I just typed above. I also get in touch with my foster homes to say "I have someone working through the system right now who is potentially interested in X" so that the foster parents get that "wake up call" a little sooner. That way, if they decide they want to adopt, I can let the PA know beforehand rather than it happening once the PA is approved and ready to meet the bird. This year I've had three foster parents adopt - and two of those happened to one PA, although to be fair the first foster parents had decided to adopt over the weekend and before they could email me that Monday, I emailed them about the PA. I actually joked with my PA saying "ok, which bird would you like to see adopted by their foster parent next?" ~ Ailsa
Unfortunately, many foster parents don't realize they want to adopt the bird until they face losing him. It happens about 25% of the time with budgies. I try to remember to tell potential adopters that any bird could be adopted at any time, without much prior notice, since previously approved adopters are always coming back to adopt another bird (at least they do with budgies), and there's not much lead time then. I've had really good foster homes tell me that yes, the budgie is still available, and then a week later find themselves unable to actually give him up. You cannot just wrench the bird away from them, but it's very annoying. I've found that it minimizes the last minute changes of heart if I let them know as soon as I do that someone is in the queue that wants their particular bird. Then, if the foster parent expresses uncertainty, I can warn the PA.
The bigger problem with the foster parent's response on Jordan is that he felt he could stipulate the living conditions to be provided by the adoptive parents. He could/should have told you earlier if there was something unusual about Jordan that would merit specific requirements being placed on the adoptive home -- not make them conditions of him giving up Jordan for adoption. If we have to negotiate with our foster homes, we'll never get a bird adopted.
All of this said, I think people fixate on tiels more than they do on budgies (except once in a while). We always say that the bird's interest comes first. If we think the foster home would be the best place for the bird, then they should get to keep him. If the new PA appears to be a better environment/custodian, then the bird should move.
I don't have a copy of the foster contract -- what do we say there? Is it a right of first refusal? The implication there is that the foster home can say they want to keep the bird any time we propose to move him, meaning they get to meet the adopter first. If it says something else, we should decide whether it says what we mean.
And bottom line -- they have to actually adopt the bird then and there.
Michelle
Michelle
--- On Wed, 3/4/09, Maria Pangelina
I specify in my first contact letter that we do not put a hold on a specific bird so any PA should not have
an expectation that a particular bird will be available to them. With macaws I require two visits to the bird
and if the second visit goes well, I will put a "hold" on and tell other PAs the bird is about to be adopted.
Re: foster parents. When I have a serious contender for a specific bird almost at the end of the approval
process I let the foster parents know so they can make their decision about adopting. It can be frustrating
if they vacillate and don't sign the contract, etc. I will then tell them we don't do false advertising and if the
bird is still available we will schedule a home visit. That usually gets them motivated.
I do all of my own phone interviews and when I am talking to the PA will ask what they like about a
specific macaw. Then I say in the event that bird is no longer available, let me tell you about other
birds that I think would do well in your home..... That way they are not totally bummed if the bird they
wanted is not available when they are approved.
Macaw Coordinator
Mickaboo
----- Original Message -----
From: "Maria Pangelina"
participants (4)
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Ailsa -
cmelteff＠comcast.net -
Maria Pangelina -
Michelle Yesney